Gift Baskets for The Hubbel's

Welcome to my next project! For weeks I have had the idea to help out The Hubbel's aka Coupon Mommy of 3 on FB. Their 3 year old daughter Emily has been diagnosed with Stage 4 Cancer and is currently in VERY intense treatment! You can read Emily's story HERE I can't even imagine what this family is going through but I have an idea that I think may bring some sunshine to their lives.

I am starting a project called Gift Baskets for The Hubbel's. With your help I would like to send the Hubbels the BEST Easter Baskets EVER! There are 3 daughters and Mom and Dad! I know with your help we can make this project come to life!

Your thoughts and prayers are greatly appreciated! If you would like to contribute to the gift baskets please email me at Sarahsewta@yahoo.com with Gift Basket's for The Hubbel's in the topic box. I have also set up a chipin widget on the right where you can donate money if you feel to. Even if you can only give a dollar, every bit helps!

Thanks

I am a dreamer!

I've had this thought bouncing around in my head for months. "I am a dreamer and Dustin is concrete." So what? Who cares? Big deal? I'm a dreamer remember, I don't need absolutes, just possibilities! But still this thought is nagging at me to write about, why? I have no idea but I feel compelled to write this. I'm not sure how this post will end up, but here goes ...



I love this picture, I think the girl looks like me! :)
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I am a dreamer! I suppose that is what makes me a good crafter. I see a vision and I make it come to life. I see the world in a rainbow of colors. Not always what it is, but what it has a possibility to become. I'm an optimist, always looking on the bright side. There's always something positive about every situation. Sometimes you just have to look for it. Sometimes you may never know what it is. But it's there! I always look on the bright side. Even when I know people are wrong I still give them the benefit of the doubt and like to believe they had good intentions and meant well. This is both a gift and a flaw, but there it is.

I also am a dreamer in the spiritual world. God speaks to me in dreams. Not every night. Not every month. But often I am awakened with a dream or vision from the Lord. I see things that are going to happen. I see and feel things that people are going through. Many times I have dreampt of giving birth and holding my child in my arms! AH those dreams are so wonderful I never want to wake up. These dreams can be very cool, but they can also be exhausting! I don't always see good things. I don't always see happy things! Some of the time these are heavy burdens that God has laid upon me to pray about. To intercede for someone. To stand in the gap. These are private things that I cannot share with anyone and most of the time I never tell a person I have had a vision about them, I just wait and pray. Sometimes I see it come to pass right away, sometimes it's years. And thankfully sometimes it never comes to pass because God has conquered and changed the circumstances!

Please do not think in any way that I am saying I am "super spiritual" or a prophet or anything like that! Nothing could be further from the truth. I'm just saying this is one way that God speaks with me.



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 Dustin on the other hand is concrete! A realist! He sees the world in black and white. Right or wrong. And yes I believe in right or wrong, but he is so absolute about it. From a young child he has had a wisdom that far precedes his age. Many older people have been jealous of his gift. I've never told him this, but I compare him to King Solomon in the bible (minus all the wives lol). He can process all aspects of a situation in record time and give a rational answer that you just can't argue with. He does not look at life through emotion, but by truth. Sometimes he's so unemotional about a situation I could scream! But his wisdom is always sound.

I asked him once how he encourages himself about God healing me and giving us a baby and he said "I don't think about it. God said it and it will happen" WHAT?!?! You don't think about it EVER!?!?! I think about it every hour, every minute of every day. SERIOUSLY NEVER?!?! "Nope, there's no need. It will happen when God is ready!" Oh I am SO envious of this! To be able to lay it all at God's feet and NEVER again worry, doubt, question... I am striving for this, but am far from there!

I often wonder why such a wise man would want someone so abstract and flighty as me. It's NOT RATIONAL!! We are opposites in nearly every area of our lives. Every area except one, that we love God with EVERY ounce of our being and yes we BOTH put God before each other! He helps me see the world through reality and truth, and I help him see the world as possibilities waiting to happen. I know all the time he is frustrated with me, and to be honest I am frustrated with myself alot of the time. I compare myself to him way to much, and see all the area's where I have failed miserably. I cannot always give the person the answer they are looking for. I don't have wisdom to make all the right choices. I hardly can quote any scriptures and half the time I can't even remember the scriptures he preached on. Only that I was moved and God changed me because of it. Try as I may I cannot be like Dustin.

So I am learning to let God use me in His own way, and it doesn't have to look like what it does with the next person. I don't have to be the preacher for God to speak through me.  God is so much bigger and stronger then we can ever imagine. So why do we think Christians should look and act like we were cut out of cookie cutters. Dustin is definately used by God, but I also am someone God can use. So I'm trying to stop comparing myself and allowing God to use me how HE wants and it's VERY freeing and liberating! I don't have to live up to man's expectations of what I should be, but I can live up to God's! How beautiful!

Prayer buddies!

This has been an awful week. Infact it is by far the worst week I've had all winter! First off I've been very sick with a bad cough. Thankfully the fever only lasted a few days, but this cough just doesn't want to go away. Secondly I am having the worst period I've had in over a year. Are the two related, who really knows. On a good month I might be a little bummed because of course this is the last thing I want to happen. But where I started out a little down, I seemed to slip down that slippery slope very quickly. My husband will tell you I have been unbearably cranky and moody!! In constant pain and very irritable. I can't seem to focus on anything for more then 5 minutes and I ask the same questions over and over without processing any answer or response. Remember my last post The Winter Blues! Yea I know ... Oh and I almost forgot, someone who thought they were giving me a "word from God" said to me that I don't have my baby yet because I'm not trusting God. Thank you for that! Why do people say mean rude things and try to pass it off as God's word? I HATE THAT!!! If you really thought I was doubting then you would have gotten further by saying "keep trusting in God! He cannot fail!" But no people tell you what they think you are doing wrong, not encourage you to do right. YES there is a difference!!!




Group Hug II (Limited Edition)
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  So anyway I thought this would be the perfect time to write a post. Everything's not going great! I don't "feel" great! I don't even feel good! But I know God is Good! And that's all that really matters. Usually I am the encourager. I try to stay positive and upbeat, always ready with an encouraging word. But this week I just couldn't seem to keep myself above water. Yea I prayed, read my bible even fasted. Still after the second day of frustration and tears I decided it was time to bring in the reinforcements! I called my prayer buddies. A group of women who I know will pray for me at the drop of a hat. A non judgemental zone where I can go and be honest and real without fear of being laughed at, mocked or rebuked for "not being spiritual enough." Within minutes I started to feel the pressure break and peace come in. Several calls, emails and prayers throughout the day made me feel stronger then I have in weeks. Although I do not "feel" great in body, I know all is well with my soul! I thank God for these GREAT Godly women he has put in my life that know how to nurture and love their own, and not kill and destroy like I have sadly seen in so many churches.

One friend even told me that God showed her the spiritual attack my husband and I have been under and she really began to weep and pray for us. Our baby IS on the way! God HAS NOT failed me! I AM NOT doubting!! And yes I have forgiven those that have wronged me. Sometimes people don't realize how bad their words hurt!

So I leave you with these thoughts! Things don't have to go great for God to be great! I don't have to fight my battles alone! Choose wisely what words you use! Love unconditionally without judging, after all you want mercy for yourself! Give someone a hug just because! Praise God through the storm for the sun will shine in the morning! Keep enduring, for you may not see your answer now but that doesn't mean it's not on the way! Believe that all things are possible!

Love you all! And a special thank you to my prayer buddies!

The Winter Blues

I know it's been a long time since I've written. And I really feel like I need to get back on track! So here's my thought for today ...

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I remember as a child my mom always seemed to get the winter blues from January - March. I would roll my eyes and think to myself "it's that time of year, here we go again" Of course I would never speak such a thing out loud, but the thoughts were there!

The last few years I have begun to understand what it was. Here in Maine the winters can be nasty. Lots of cold snowy days. Icy roads. Praying that the pipes won't freeze and bust. That you'll have enough oil to make it through the winter. That your car will stay on the road and not slip all over the place, always cautious for the driver who has 4 wheel drive and thinks they are invincible. The list goes on and on but the worst for me is the sunshine! I MISS THE SUNSHINE!!! Even on a sunny day it's usually pretty hazy and overcast. And I begin to understand what Mom was going through. The winter blues!

And of course that will lead to my favorite time of year being spring. I love being able to go outside with only a sweater on. I love seeing the tiny crocuses bud through the snowy grass, bringing hope that a new season has come. There's just something about spring that makes me feel alive and joyful. But until then I must endure the winter. Many days I find myself wishing it away and praying for spring to come early.

Recently a friend of my, also TTC, and I were complaining about the winter and joking that we would like to skip Feb all together. Well another lady in the church, kinda like a mother figure to us, gently reprimanded us and said "Come on you two cowards. Whats up with Feb. Don't we all serve the same God and don't you know that whatever is in Feb He planned for you to either teach you or bless you and if you miss it you'll miss His perfect plan. What if Feb was the month of conceivement for either of you MaMa's to be; would you miss it. Don't ever let me hear you say you'd give up one precious day that our Jesus would give to you..what is that all about? I'm 63 and value life and am watching a precious lady I've known most of that life heading into her final days and I know she'd give anything for one more kiss from her precious husband and one more day to me a ma'ma to her children...I'm spanking both of you!"

Tears! Tears of repentance! Tears of thankfulness that she wasn't afraid to speak the truth! Tears of thankfulness that Jesus loves me so much that he would send this reminder to me that everyday is precious! Those words ate at me the whole day. I couldn't sleep at all, tossing and turning. Thinking of that "spiritual spanking" I had just received! And like a child throwing a fit it snapped me out of my temper tantrum! (So thanks Sister!) I woke up with the scripture on my mind:

Psa 118:24 This is the day which the LORD hath made; we will rejoice and be glad in it.

Thank God for today, and find something to rejoice in!

***UPDATE*** My friend actually did conceive at the end of Feb/ beginning of March. The time she was wishing away was actually the time God had planned to bless her. Hold fast to the promises God has made to you and believe! This could be YOUR TIME for God bless you!
~Sarah